"You are Special"

What comes to mind when you hear: "You are Special!" 

• Do you think: "Yeah right, what are you wanting from me"  
• How about something like: "That's right, I am special bring me my golden slippers"
• Or maybe: "Wow... That was rude, remind me to take you off my christmas card list"

Though I was joking a little above, I feel like this phrase is something we both don't believe about ourselves or we've taken it too far.  It's been my experience in over 10 years of full-time ministry that I often meet two kinds of students: ones that think they're more special than everyone & everything else and ones that think they are not worth much at all.  Yes, there is another group but they are not very common... let that sink in!  The sad news is, as adults, we often fall into those two groups as well.  I know this to be true because I'm on social media!!  I do not believe facebook, twitter, instagram, etc. are the devil but I do think there's something about these public platforms that magnifies our need to either feel special or show people we're "special."  I know this because I do/feel it too... 

• I post that picture (only the ones that don't make me look fat)... and wait for lots of 'likes'!!  
• I share the really good story (after tweaking it to make it a little more funny)... hoping for 'shares'!!  
• I change my status from 'excited' to 'sad'... waiting for someone to comment asking about it!!

Bottom line... There's a reason we are special and it's not a 'what we do' as much as it is a 'why we are'!!  Recently, I re-read a book with my kids that reminded me of this simple truth yet again.  The book was "You are Special" by Max Lucado.  I'm guessing you have probably read it or heard of it but if you haven't, I'm strongly recommending you get it and if you have, give it another read tonight (Make it a Faith Talk this week).

In the book a small wooden person named Punchinello goes about his life as other wemmicks place 'golden stars' on those they think are special and 'grey dots' on those they do not.  As much as I want to share with you the whole story... I'd rather you read it!!  However, I wanted to share with you three things that really jumped out at me in new ways:

1) "...everytime they got a star, it made them feel soo good and it made them want to do it again..." Why do 'likes', 'shares' and 'followers' on social media (and life) make me feel so good!?  Does this make me special?

2) "...in fact, he had so many dots people would come up to him and give him grey dots for no reason at all..." Why do I follow the crowd so easily even if it hurts other people in the process!?  Am I so desperate to feel special that I'm willing to bring others down?

((SPOILER ALERT))

3) In the end, Punchinello meets a girl with no stars or dots "...and it's not because people didn't try..." but because she found her worth in the way the Maker saw her.  "...each day I go and see Eli..."  Why is our culture as lost as I am?  Am I spending daily time with the one whom gives me true worth and direction!?

My grandpa used to say: "It's not what you know, it's who you know!"  Though he was often talking about work, politics, etc. this is at the heart, the Gospel!!  The gospel isn't just for those who don't feel special but also for those that think they are special for the wrong reasons.

May we take some extra time today to make sure our kids hear they are special... May we give our kids a clear reason why they are special... May we ourselves hear that we are special because of the Creator... May we make it a point to show someone else how special they are and may we be so bold to give them the reason why as well!!

Do you think you're beautiful!?

Several years ago Dove (yes, the soap) started a campaign called "Real Beauty" in which they wanted to point out the problems in our culture in the way we view 'beauty' and communicate that everyone is beautiful in their own way.  Though I'm not trying to sell you Dove products (and no, I do not own stock) or saying their company does everything right, I love this campaign and the videos they have made to address it.  One of their newest is called "Beauty Sketches" and is getting a lot of traffic this week via social media and I wanted to ask if you'd watch it with me (posted below)?

Watch the full 7-minute version here

What about you?  How do you feel about yourself?  Do you think you are Beautiful?

I'm unsure of what you thought of this video but for me it strikes my core (like yes, I cried watching this).  No... I'm not a girl and though that seemed to be the audience for this video, it still got to me.  I'm a man with a calling to love people (students to be even more specific) and there's nothing that tears my heart more than seeing kids beat up emotionally (and physically) by culture, their peers and even themselves.  Thus, telling teens that they are special and loved (often I use "Awesome") is one of my most favorite things to do in the whole world!!

There are lots of reasons we get down on ourselves... What is your reason?
- Bad relationship with your Mom/Dad growing up?
- Did you have a rough middle school experience?
- Has the divorce caused you to think you are unlovable?
- Are you ashamed of some past 'sin' that makes you feel ugly?
- Do you just not feel as "successful" as the family next door?

Let me shift for a second and talk about our kids:
Did you know that 1 out of 3 girls are sexually abused before they reach 18 (1 out of 6 for boys)?  Did you know that it raises to 2 out of 3 girls if you throw in their freshmen year of college?  Let that sink in...

With all of what we talked about in our own lives and then echoed with our own children... No wonder we feel "ugly"!!  No wonder we search for affection and love "in all the wrong places"!!  No wonder really bad things are happening in our culture and schools every day!!

BUT there's Good News... There's Hope!!
In a love letter written by a boy named Solomon he states: "You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no blemish in you."  This is the same way Jesus sees you!!  That was too fast... Go back and read that again!!  In Genesis Moses states that God thinks you're"very good"... In Zephaniah it states that the Lord "delights in you", as well as rejoicing and singing over you!!

I love the saying pictured below...

God is so in love with you AND HE LIKES YOU!!!  If you've grown up in the "Bible Belt" you've probably been told that God loves you more times than you can count but did you know that God likes you!!  He loves hearing from you, spending time with you, watching you, holding you!!  God is crazy about you because you are exactly the way He created you... BEAUTIFUL!!

May you feel His love a little more today... May we pass that love on to others... May Jesus become as precious to you as you are to Him... May our kids know that we not only love them but like them... May the Spirit prompt us in taking opportunities to tell others how beautiful they are... May you rest in the loving arms of the Creator today... May you believe!!

Click on the links below to see more of Dove's Real Beauty Campaign videos:

- Camera Shy (showing how as we get older we become ashamed)

- Self-Esteem (showing the way we tear ourselves down)

- Onslaught (showing the assault from media & culture on our kids)

- Will Quit (showing the effects of how we feel has on our activities)

- Evolution (showing how far photoshop takes modeling)

**If you are interested in my personal three-hour training of the '10 Things YOU Should Know About Teens & Tweens' please e-mail me for a FREE copy of the manuel and video link!!

**Follow Jeff, also known as "surgeberg" on: Facebook, Twitter & Instagram

There's signs everywhere...

Over the past several months all three of our kids have jumped head first into different activities trying to find out what their "thing" is... Jackson is committed to getting the coveted blackbelt at Karate and Charleigh has loved bouncing on the trampolines at Gymnastics.  Creighton, however, continues to explore, trying both of those activities and beyond!!  Though I'm not pumped about moving from one event to the next it has provided lots of opportunity to see a reoccurring theme in "Children's Activities" all over.  

Below is a picture of a sign seen posted on a little league baseball field...

This is a flyer that was sent home with us from Karate...

This is a book excerpt that was posted at Gymnastics last month...

Three different signs, from three different locations, all pointing to the same thing: Kids do what they see their parents/adults do!!  The Bible says it this way: "If anyone causes one of these little ones to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea" (Matthew 18:6).  

Though that verse is talking about leading others into sin and that's not exactly the implication of the signs, I hope it is a strong enough reminder the importance we play in the example to children (especially our own)!!  

Are we going to hit "homeruns" every single day with our kids?  Probably not... 

But no one walks up the the plate to "strike-out"!!**

May we strive to be holy in our daily lives... Just as is commanded in Matthew 5:48 (100% Jesus)!!  May we look for incredible Faith Walk moments this week!!  May we be the kind of men and women we want our sons and daughters to become!!  May we be a community of believers that encourages transparent living!!  May we love our kids enough to live life above reproach... Not without mistakes but full of forgiveness and mercy!!  

**Only added so Matt Fowler would think I know something about Baseball!!

Any one of these pictures could be a blogpost all by itself... In fact, please take 3 minutes and read each of the statements in the "Boost Your Kids Self-Esteem" pic... This is Spiritual Parenting!!

Which do you need to work on this week!?