Top 10 Moments of 2017 (and, as always, honorable mentions)

With so much that has happened this year and even more happening RIGHT NOW... I'm both excited to post this and yet sad to realize it is only my third blog post in the past 12-months (there will be many more this coming year, get ready!)! 

In a nutshell, 2018 is going to be crazy!!  We have spent the entire year laying groundwork to finally launch the 'Modern Day Agoge' (Spartan Code's monthly training plan) THIS MONTH!!  Not to mention, I have started yet another new position, still within the Walmart family but new focus, AND yes with all that and the fact that my family is still my number one priority, it's going to be a bumpy ride.  

All that being said... Let's do a quick look back into the top 10 moments of 2017 (Reminder that not all moments are great but they are the biggest "moments" of the year).

Honorable Mentions:
*) Dallas Cowboys (This past season has been a big let down, however, last seasons' playoffs were also in 2017, so they balance out)!!

Children See... Children Do!!

Disclaimer: This video is an actual ad that was ran in Australia and is very real. There is no language but there is some hard scenarios, please do NOT watch with your children!

Can I ask you a couple questions:
- How did this commercial make you feel?
- What was the most offensive part of the video to you?
- Why is a kid giving someone "the finger" often more offensive than the domestic abuse?

Bad News: Jesus said, "And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck."  

Good News: Jesus said, “Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me.”

Full Context: Mark 9:35-50

We have a very unique and high calling as parents and leaders. 

May we live to honor Him and lead our kids in humble obedience!! 

I don't think I want to say much more, instead just let it sink in... 
AND let's discuss in the comments below!! 

Really... A gum commercial!?

So there I was minding my own business when this commercial came on (It takes one minute):

In case the video doesn't start above: Click Here

I KNOW RIGHT!!!  How did that gum commercial make me cry!?  If it didn't, you have no soul (or maybe you just don't have a daughter yet)!!  For me, this video hits the very core of what I want as a parent: to see our kids grow healthy and strong.  We want to be there and we want them to remember those times as much as we will.  

I don't have much this week but a couple questions I'd love for you to answer to yourself:

• How much time have you spent with your son or daughter this week?
• Have you been able to carve out some one-on-one time this month?
• Did you get a chance to just sit with them at the bookend times (breakfast or bedtime)?

"Family"...the new selling point

A couple of weeks back I posted a commercial from Extra (Yeah, the gum company) that I think "nails it" in the world of family ministry.  Without a doubt it nails something inside me to what I want with my girls (See the whole post here).  In fact last night I got to go on another Daddy-Daughter Date with my two beautiful girls.  I wasn't planning on going on one this week but I received an e-mail from Chili's saying they were hosting a "Daddy-Daughter Night Out" including dessert, a picture with frame and necklace for the girls... FOR FREE!!!  A pastor can't pass that up.  

As we were having our fun little evening out I saw on a nearby TV a commercial that articulated exactly what I was trying to create right then (I'll come back to it).  In fact in the past several weeks I have seen a bunch of commercials that are selling the same thing... Family!!  Why are so many companies using "family" to tug at our heart strings (I can literally give you over a dozen "family focused" ads from the past year... "Prove it" you say,send me an e-mail and I'll hook you up with links)?  Is it working?  Is there something going on in our culture, a shift to new (or lost) priorities?  


I believe we are living in an exciting time.  A time where choices will matter again.  A time where family (and not just mom, dad and 2.5 kids) is something that must be apart of our culture.  A community of folks who love each other, share life together, play together and hopefully push our kids to a higher standard of living (relational wealth vs. financial wealth).  The crazy thing is this vision isn't "new", in fact its been around for a very long time.  TheTorah puts it this way: 

"Listen, Israel! The Eternal is our True God—He alone. You should love Him, your True God, with all your heart and soul, with every ounce of your strength.  Make the things I’m commanding you today part of who you are.  Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you’re sitting together in your home and when you’re walking together down the road. Make them the last thing you talk about before you go to bed and the first thing you talk about the next morning.  Do whatever it takes to remember them: tie a reminder on your hand and bind a reminder on your forehead where you’ll see it all the time, such as on the doorpost where you cross the threshold or on the city gate." (Translation from 'The Voice')

Two practical questions pop out to me in the above text:

• Am I "being" the example I want to see in my children?
• Am I taking the time to "do whatever it takes" to help them remember?

Back to the commercial that sparked everything for me this week...

In one minute, some business nails both principles we stated above: Be & Remember.  This should be more than a deep desire for us but something we put at the top of our 'things to do' list!  Consequentially this commercial also gives what could be our purpose statement at NBFamilies: "We know we are not the center of your life, but we will do our best to help you connect to what is"

I believe if you're taking time out of your day to read a blog about family you're probably already doing some of the above mentioned.  But our hope and prayer is that we as a community would embrace 'being a disciple of Christ' first and then looking for ways that our children would remember (Faith Talks, Faith Walks & Faith Mission).  May the passion for our family overflow beyond just us and impact the entire community we call New Beginnings (and our city, country, world)!!  

Snow Day!!!

"Snow Day"... I'm not sure if there is another set of words that when used together bring more excitement and joy to kids yet often anger and fear to parents.  Though I'm joking a little, you know what I'm talking about.  The first snow day is like: "sledding is the best", the second day is: "alright, that's fine, we could do another day" but the third day is: "Our school's name better not come up... Nooooooo!!!  What are they thinking, the streets are fine!?"

Recently I had a realization that I don't have much more time with my kids.  Couple that with the fact that our kids go to public schools and time together is limited, I have made it a goal to take vacation time anytime my kids are out of school.  I know that most are not blessed with a cool enough job to be able to take a day-off when the kids are out of school for holidays, especially not for a "snow day".  My heart this morning isn't about having days-off to be a better parent but making sure we take the time however we can get it.  Last week, Courtney sent me a story of a family in New Jersey that took advantage of an opportunity to create memories together through building an igloo (Click here to read the whole story).  The thing that I loved the most in the whole story was dad's response at the end: "There is never a good time to stop your life and take on some a silly family project...But if you don't stop every once in a while, you never will."  

Trust me when I tell you we do not stop life enough to do silly family projects and I often blow it on seeing great Faith Walk moments.  But I'm trying...  That statement is the spirit that has inspired us to do more.  To look for ways to find joy in the now and not just hopeful for "when we have enough money saved up."  To take time-off even when it doesn't seem like a "good time" knowing we are not promised tomorrow.  Many folks know that my step-father ("Pop") passed away two years ago.  Most of you probably don't know that it happened while we were working on a floor for my daughters' playhouse.  Though it has been hard thinking about what else he could have done all those times he came to help me or the retirement I know my mom and he were looking forward to, I also know he would have had it no other way.  He loved making memories with his grandkids and is smiling watching us play every chance we take.  May we never waste a moment!!  

Over the last month we have seen several "snow days" and my prayer is that the Berg kids remember each of them with joy and excitement!!  Below are a few pics from this year's snow days:

There's signs everywhere...

Over the past several months all three of our kids have jumped head first into different activities trying to find out what their "thing" is... Jackson is committed to getting the coveted blackbelt at Karate and Charleigh has loved bouncing on the trampolines at Gymnastics.  Creighton, however, continues to explore, trying both of those activities and beyond!!  Though I'm not pumped about moving from one event to the next it has provided lots of opportunity to see a reoccurring theme in "Children's Activities" all over.  

Below is a picture of a sign seen posted on a little league baseball field...

This is a flyer that was sent home with us from Karate...

This is a book excerpt that was posted at Gymnastics last month...

Three different signs, from three different locations, all pointing to the same thing: Kids do what they see their parents/adults do!!  The Bible says it this way: "If anyone causes one of these little ones to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea" (Matthew 18:6).  

Though that verse is talking about leading others into sin and that's not exactly the implication of the signs, I hope it is a strong enough reminder the importance we play in the example to children (especially our own)!!  

Are we going to hit "homeruns" every single day with our kids?  Probably not... 

But no one walks up the the plate to "strike-out"!!**

May we strive to be holy in our daily lives... Just as is commanded in Matthew 5:48 (100% Jesus)!!  May we look for incredible Faith Walk moments this week!!  May we be the kind of men and women we want our sons and daughters to become!!  May we be a community of believers that encourages transparent living!!  May we love our kids enough to live life above reproach... Not without mistakes but full of forgiveness and mercy!!  

**Only added so Matt Fowler would think I know something about Baseball!!

Any one of these pictures could be a blogpost all by itself... In fact, please take 3 minutes and read each of the statements in the "Boost Your Kids Self-Esteem" pic... This is Spiritual Parenting!!

Which do you need to work on this week!? 

Tips for Swimming...

Recently I read a swimming article for parents that stated: "If your kid is anxious about staying afloat, these tips will ease her into action."  Sounded like a good read so I skimmed on!!  I was excited and amused to see their bullet points and how they were completely transferable for parents personally and to engage their own kids with 'the Mission'.

- "Learn the Basics"
"You can either teach your kid yourself or hire a swim instructor. 'In lessons, kids focus on proper technique, and then Mom and Dad can focus on play.'"  At New Beginnings we want to come alongside you (the parent) in the discipleship process.  This means we want to help with ideas, equipping and even just be a sounding board to listen.  We also would be honored to be apart of your child/students life to help with some of the instruction of the basics so you can focus on how they apply to everyday life.  This is why at all of our NBFamily ministries we provide information about what we are studying on Sundays and Wednesday not to mention some take home guides to follow-up with the 'basics' that were taught about their faith.  Our prayer is that while you incorporate those tools it could transition into a consistent "Faith Talk" each week (a time you set aside and take just a few minutes to connect with the Bible and then an age appropriate activity to solidify it to their (and your) mind)!!  Be on the look-out for the brand new 14-week faith talk tool (walking through the 12 major events of the Bible) launching after labor day AND ministry specific Family Equipping taking place each Sunday morning in W301 (more details to follow).

- "Forget the Floaties"
"Not only can they give him a false sense of security, but they discourage proper form because they force his body to be vertical instead of horizontal in the water."  This principle is amazing!!  We often use "crutches" to do specific tasks thinking it will make us more efficient or better in some way.  At the time it seems all well and good but after awhile we realize our need for the crutch and often find ourselves farther from the original goal.  A big example for me was my phone... I remember very vividly when I got my first iPhone.  I was amazed as the days went by using this new device that would keep my calendar and answer my calls (no more palmpilot folks).  It could store thousands of contacts and hours of music but one day it froze up.  After hours of testing, it landed on the desk of a "Genius."  Though they could replace it for me at small price of $250 there were a couple other things we could try first.  What was crazy is over the next MILLION YEARS (couple days) as my phone was on the fritz, I realized a lot of things had changed:  I couldn't listen to "my songs" on my way to work or while working out, Some e-mails I had saved because of the content were unaccessible, I no longer remembered phone numbers (I had stopped memorizing them since they were saved in contacts), There was nothing to do while going the bathroom (don't lie, you take your phone in with you too), etc.  My iPhone, though so helpful in many areas had become a crutch and actually put me in a worse position on many things and I didn't even notice until it was gone.  What are the "floaties" you are putting on your kids or yourself (Is it: Making summer camp or VBS but never during year? Memorization of Bible facts but no understanding of the Gospel? Pushing baptism before they're ready? A salvation moment but no life change? Etc.)!?

- "Take the Plunge"
"Go ahead and carry your child into shallow water -- even if she's kicking and screaming." Often I have seen kids and students make choices and sometimes not make choices that dictate the whole families situation.  What I like about this point is that it can be taken either way: Maybe your son or daughter is needing a little encouragement to get connected or plugged in, maybe they have no desire to get involved, maybe they just don't want to go to church at all?  Will you do me a favor... before you give up will you do the following three steps: 
1) Please, let myself and the other NBFamily Pastors know!!  We would love to be praying for you, encouraging you and looking for more intentional ways to get them a solid connecting point.  
2) Urge them to come three times to a specific program (Yes, even if it's "kicking and screaming").  I know this is a big ask but it has a proven track record if started and encouraged at home!  If you can get them there three times it will be our job to keep them coming!!  
3) Personally get involved in some capacity at New Beginnings.  The fact is, often kids do what they see their parents do.  If parents are just dropping kids off each wednesday at church, consistently skipping sunday morning worship to do other things or just too busy to actually be in a small group... THE KIDS WILL FOLLOW SUIT!!  Please consider getting into a D-Group this fall (brand new groups start next Sunday, Sept. 8th.  Click here for more info) 

Do you have “dates” with your daughter?

It may not be officially "summertime" but this is Oklahoma and the weather doesn't get much better than this... And with that, what are you doing with your time?  

The Berg's love getting out together (Not to mention Berg Family Fun Nights)... And Court and I LOVE having "Daddy-Daughter"/"Mommy-Son" Dates!!  Do you!?

((Here's a pic from a recent Daddy-Daughter Date to Claire's))

*A lot of dads like the idea, but they don’t know where to start. Here's a quick blurb from dad and blogger Jay Payleitner.  

Here is Jay’s simple advice for that challenge: Enter her world and enjoy your time together.

Jay continues: “You can’t force deep, meaningful, life-changing conversations. But if you keep showing up … they’ll happen. And you’ll be glad you were there.” Click here to keep reading the blog.

Jay provides about a hundred different great ideas you can carry out with your daughter at her age—and I know at least some of them will be great with sons, too.

Jay’s bottom line:

“The primary purpose of dating your daughter is making memories and cementing your lifetime connection. But there’s another huge benefit to showing up on time, opening her car door, treating her with respect, and handling any mishaps with grace and a smile... You’re modeling for your daughter the way any boy should act when she goes out on any date at any time.”

Also, I think one of Jay’s suggestions will really surprise you: “In the middle of your time together, hope something goes terribly wrong.” More ...

Since every father-child relationship is different, what ideas do you have to add? Maybe you can help another dad bond with his child. What are your secrets?

*Excerpts taken from Carey Casey (CEO of National Center for Fathering) post.

"Daddy...it's your favorite"

A few weeks ago I was sound asleep when a small hand was placed on my shoulder.  When my eyes adjusted I found another face nose to nose with mine and a sweet little voice followed saying: "Daddy... it's your favorite!"

There's two things that I love thinking about in that moment:
- Charleigh thinks she's my favorite
- It's true!!

Before you get mad stick with me... Keep reading!!  I remember when Jackson (our oldest) was born and thinking: "I can never love someone as much as I love this little guy right now"!!  In fact, when I heard we were expecting Creighton (our second) I remember thinking: "how am I going to love her as much as I love my son".  This wasn't because she was a girl and he was a boy but I didn't have a category for how my heart could handle loving something as much, or worse, was I going to have to love my son less to make room for some love for her!?  BUT, the craziest thing happened... Creighton was born and in an instant I held her and looked at her and thought: "Holy cow, I love her with everything I am"!!  I bet if you have kids, you know what I'm talking about...

However, if you're keeping score at home, you know we have one more... Charleigh!!  And she came to us a little differently... She's adopted (Read more about her story here)!!  Though, I had heard jokes like "you love your adopted kids more because you get to pick them and are stuck with the others" this isn't the thought that creeps in the hours before seeing the child you are to adopt.  For me, it was: "How could I ever love someone more than my own blood?"  Yet, that morning in October will forever be sketched into my mind when I picked up this baby girl and though I was trying to play it cool (because I knew 'failed adoptions' were fairly normal) I thought: "I will love and fight for you the rest of my life".  And for the first time I understood the true essence ofEphesians 1:4-5 "He chose us... to be adopted through Jesus"!!

I LOVE MY FAMILY!!!  And each one of my kids really is my favorite... I don't know how that works but I bet it has something to do with us having the characteristics of God.  You see, I'm God's favorite!!  BUT SO ARE YOU!!!  I know, I know... In our culture we are taught there's only "one favorite" but if you look up the definition it says: "one that is treated or regarded with special favor or liking".  Every one of us are treated with special favor and liking by the Savior--the question is whether you want to see it or not!?  Each one of my kids knows I love them and I hope each one of them knows they are, in fact, my favorite!!