Digital Citizenship

Over the past several months I have had the opportunity to travel and speak to students all over Oklahoma.  Though I speak on many different topics within "youth culture" the same one continues to be requested: 'To #Selfie or Not To #Selfie' (Healthy Social Media & Cell Phone use).  It seems EVERY student is struggling with the same thing: how do I handle the freedom of the internet!?  

Most recently I received an email from the Computer Applications teacher at a local high school asking if there were any resources to discuss with his class regarding what he calls: 'Digital Citizenship'.  What a great question, and ultimately, what a expectation for our incoming adults.  How can we become a Healthy Digital Citizen!!  Though this is practically a brand new idea, there's already some great stuff out there (See some of the links at the bottom if interested).  In reading many articles, I think all ages should ponder a few questions when thinking about the internet:

• What are our responsibilities in regards to using the internet?  
• How should we treat others and should we look out for others?  
• How do we want to be viewed or perceived by others?  
• Should we give back, in some way, through our use of the internet?

Have you ever thought about the internet in this way?  Have you ever "abused" yourself or someone by misusing the freedom of the internet?  Personally, so much time has gone by and so many habits have been formed by non-intentional internet use that I'm frustrated or angry in ways that I completely brought on myself.

Recently, I saw this video and felt it is the most honest take on many of the roles we play in the context of social media in our lives.  Before I say anything more, take two and half minutes and check this out...

Though this video is primarily via Facebook, I think the the context can be applicable to any of the many social media avenues we are engaged in each day!!  Here are a couple questions that popped into my mind when watching this video...

• Do I only post my "best" life (the good stuff)?
• Do I exaggerate what's going on in my life?
• Am I looking for affirmation when I post?
• Why do I post negativity (Is it just attention seeking)? 
• Do I ignore people "calling for help" (literally and figuratively)?
• How much of my life should I be posting anyways?
• Can my posts hurt others?
• Is it my responsibility to make sure others are not hurt by what I post?

The list can really go on and on... How do you feel about some of those questions?  Would you be willing to discuss it either in the comments or contacting me?

Here are some great articles and resources to help with becoming a healthy digital citizen:

• Nine Elements of Being a Digital Citizen
• Common Sense Media
• Internet Safety Tips for Parents
• Empowering Students to Use the Internet Responsibly & Safely
• 5 Ways to Teach Kids to Use Technology Safely

If interested in bringing 'To #Selfie or Not To #Selfie' to your school please visit our website (Surge Leadership) and click on contact.  If you'd like a FREE copy of the '10 Things You Should Know About Teens & Tweens' manual you can also find it here.

Cell Phone & Social Media 101

This week I was bombarded with, for lack of a better word, TONS of articles regarding cell-phones and social networks... Though these are two topics we have covered before (10 Apps You Should Be Aware of & Darn Technology Distracting Us from Each other) with the amount of articles posted this week I thought I would do a brief Cellphone & Social Media 101!!  

Cell Phone 101: Technology is neutral... It by itself is not bad or good!

Texting

-       “The average teenager texts 4,000 texts a month” (Group Publishing)
-    "78% of all teens have a cell phone" (Just over half are smart phones)

-       “31% of teen phone users deflect conversations by faking calls” (Denver Post)

-       As of 2011, AT&T was the only company who would print out text messages upon request.  However, because of the 2006 Consumer Telephone Records Protection Act parents can get a print out of your son/daughter’s phone if court ordered.

-       “Over half of 11 to 14 year olds say they have been in a dating relationship…But dating to tweens isn’t what adults think: relationships are fleeting but all consuming” “Tweens date in packs but expect their boyfriend/girlfriend to be monogamous…firing over 300 texts back and forth each day…breaking up is most commonly done via a text” (Homeword)

Sexting

-       Sext messages created by minors = child pornography.  Taking nude, sexually explicit, pictures of a minor, even if it is of yourself, is a felony and then sending those pictures to others is a second felony.  All recipients of that sext message can also be found guilty of a felony (even if they didn't want to receive it) because it is possession of child pornography.  Being convicted of possession or distribution of child pornography can get you on a sex offender list which will stay with you for LIFE and affect your ability to live where you want to, getting into college and getting a job. 

-      “39% of all teens have sent a sexually suggestive text” (Parents Guide...Cell Phones)

-       “48% of teens say they have received such messages" (sexually suggestive or nude)

Apps & Internet accessibility (2013, Apple announced 60,000,000,000 apps downloaded)

-       Top ‘Apps’ (Applications):

o   Social Media: Facebook (#1 Free app), Twitter, Instagram, Vine, etc.

o   Streaming: Spotify, Pandora, YouTube, etc.

o   Games: Candy Crush Saga, Flappy Bird, Clash of Clans, Bike Race, etc.

- Angry Birds (most profitable game ever…downloaded over 2 billion times)

o   Very Concerned: Omegle, SnapChat, Whisper, Kik, Tinder, etc. (Click here for more)

5 Tips for Managing Cell Phone Usage with Your Teen:

-       Talk together as a family about when it is or isn't appropriate to use the cell phone (no cell phone after 9pm, no cell phone until your homework is completed, etc.)

-       Make your child responsible of the phone and helping out with the bill (All of it, some of it, just the texting, chores for it, etc.).  Go over the bill with them.

o   Pre-pay or pay as you go, Like Kajeet

-       Take it away if they are failing in school or not following through with rules you set! Let them have it back when they show progress!

o   Agree on a “Phone Contract”, See: Should I SMASH My Kid’s Phone

-       Have a “charging station” or centralized location for all cell-phones (and ipods).  Have mandatory charging times during family times, dinner, bedtime, etc.

-       Be the example of healthy cell phone use.  Show them what you want to see in regards to how, when and where to use your cell phone.  If you have it out at dinner they will!

Parental Controls

-       AT&T, Sprint, Verizon & T-Mobile
-   "Bless them with blackouts... 
Set limits; you are the parent. There should be times of day, and especially night, when the internet, text messaging and other media is unaccessible. Your kids may complain, but it is a gift to give them downtime and remove the possibility of being connected." (Guard and Guide Your Children Online)

*Lots of cool ideas for Cellphone Safety

Social Media 101: What the school & mall was to kids of the 60s-90s is what the Internet is to the millennial!

The Bigs 

-       Facebook (1,110,000,000 “Friends” as of March 2013)

-       Twitter (300 billion Tweets Sent as of October 2013)

-       Instagram (55 million Pictures shared each day)

-       Myspace (Making a comeback after essentially being purchased by Justin Timberlake)

*"88% of teens have seen someone be mean/cruel on a social networking site" (UKnowKids)

Top 3 Websites in the world…

-       Google (Around 13 Billion searches a month… Estimated to be worth over $270 billion)

-       Facebook (Around 45% of internet users visit facebook)

-       YouTube (Purchased by Google for $1.65 billion)

o   More than 1 billion unique users visit YouTube each month

o   YouTube reaches more U.S. Adults aged 18-34 than any cable network

o   100 Hours of video are uploaded every minute

o   Top Videos

- #1 most viewed: ‘Gangnam Style’ by PSY (1,915,156,692 views)

-  First video uploaded “Me at the zoo”, April 23^rd 2005 (13 million views)

The Good, the Bad & the Ugly…

-       Some say all this technology & media stimuli, creates a heightened awareness to culture & better ability to multi-task!!  (‘Everything Bad is Good for You’ by Johnson)

-       “Tweens that spend waking hours switching between social networks & texting are more likely to develop social problems” (Standford University: Dev. Psychology)

-       Signs of addiction (Illinois Institute for Addiction Recovery):

o   Preoccupation with ______________

o   Increased use of ______________

o   Repeated, unsuccessful efforts to control ______________ use

o   Restlessness, moodiness, depression when cutting down on ______________

o   Online longer than originally intended

o   Jeopardized or risked loss of significant relationships

o   Lies to family members or others to conceal use of ______________

o   Use ______________ to escape and relive problems 
**Netaddiction.net 

Tips for Parents with Social Media…

-       Have an agreement in regards to knowing passwords and what networks they are in

-       Privacy Settings must be used (25% of Facebook users don’t bother)

-       Develop rules for what can and should be posted online (pictures, location, etc.)

-       Computer in a centralized location in the home (this is hard with iphones & laptops)

-       Discuss Online dangers (See: Wiredsafety.org and TheDemandProject.org)

 

“Most young adults are over-exposed to information earlier than ready and under-exposed to real life situations later than they were or should be ready” - Tim Elmore (Artificial Maturity)

3 Things we can do starting RIGHT NOW...

Be the example you want to see!!  

Discuss helpful boundaries!!

Empower them to make positive choices!!

Here's just TEN of the articles sent to me and/or posted this week (if interested):
- Secret social media apps teens don't want you to know they are using

- 10 Reasons Why Handheld Devices Should be Banned for Children Under 12

- Children banned from using their mobile phones after 9pm

- Brush with Predator Inspires Child Safety Tech Startup

- Parents Still Paying Bills of 'Independent' Kids

- Millennials Consume Content Every Waking Hour

- Smartphone Use in Restaurants Leads to Distracted Parenting

- Guard and Guide Your Children Online
- Adults can 'Sext' Kids in Texas Because of Free Speech and Miley Cyrus
- Selfie Society

**If you are interested in my personal three-hour training of the '10 Things YOU Should Know About Teens & Tweens' please e-mail me for a FREE copy of the manuel and video link!!

**Follow Jeff, also known as "surgeberg" on: Facebook, Twitter & Instagram

10 Apps You Should Be Aware Of

I was just getting used to Facebook too… Last week I read an article by ‘Time Magazine’ that said “over 11 million young people have fled facebook since 2011” (Read article here).

Though I had noticed this taking place with the students I have regular contact with I hadn’t read anything definitive on it nationally.  So why is this happening?  As the article hints, “It’s lost its cool cachet” but when I talk with teens I sometimes hear a different tune. Some say: “I don’t want to read all the ‘reposts’ of articles”, others: “I just like seeing pictures” or my personal favorite:  “my parents are on it!!”  So where does that leave us? What are they doing and how can I help equip others.  Let me give a quick disclaimer that if our goal is spying (“creeping” if you want the technical teen term) than we are simply going to see the ‘herd’ move to another place before we ever got used to this one.  It’s almost like we have the opportunity to be a “national geographic photographer” in the wild.  If we make too much noise or interfere with the “animals” they are simply going to run away.  But if we sit tight and watch from a distance we can observe the “wild” in its natural environment and really see what they do and who they hang out with… In essence, who they are at their core (or at least who they are experimenting with being)!!  I’m not saying don’t be involved, but consider listening, learning, ‘liking’ a few pics, etc. before firing the critical comment that’s going to get us ‘blocked’ or just hesitation from them being them. What the school was to the 60-70s kid, the mall was to the 80-90s kid, the Internet is to the millennial (kids today).

All that being said… Here’s a list of top ‘apps’ (since most teens engage the internet via their phones far more that their computer), students I've worked with, are using and a list of apps you should be aware of as a parent.

Top apps used by NBHighSchool students:

#1 Instagram (Hands down #1 with our students and nationally among teens)

#2 Facebook & Twitter

#3 SnapChat

#4 iFunny

#5 Flappy Bird, Pandora & Pintrest

‘Jeff’s top 10 social networks to be aware of’… Disclaimer: I am NOT saying these are all bad!  I am providing information and my opinion that parents should be engaged and some what “in the know” of what is possibly on your son or daughters iPhone, iPod, etc.  I also think you are one of the best identifiers to whether it’s an addiction or not (Having heard a lot of adults say they are addicted ‘CandyCrush’ you may know what I mean!).

#10 Pandora & Spotify

I hesitate putting either of these two apps on the list but I have a lot of questions regularly about music (“Have you heard of this group”, “Is this song popular now”, “I had no clue that’s what that said”, etc.).  As I write this I’m using my Spotify app and listening to ‘Billboard Hot 100’ playlist trying to get caught up on what’s popular right now (most of the time not what I enjoy listening too anymore J).  That all being said, just be aware that both these apps provide the opportunity to listen to any and all music without restriction or censorship.  This means they may not have the songs or band you’ve said ‘no’ to on their phone but they may have a playlist with them on their app.

#9 iFunny

This app is essentially just giving you access to an online world of pictures “of fun made to your taste.”  You can figure out by their own description that they are all over the map: “simulated gambling”, “mild alcohol, tobacco or drug use”, “frequent/intense prolonged graphic or sadistic realistic violence”, “crude humor”, “Mature/suggestive themes”, etc.  Are some of the pics funny and clean, sure… You may have to wade through the ‘muck’ to get there though.  *Also “you must be at least 17 years old to download this app” (or at list click a button that you promise you are)!

#8 Vine

“Tween and teen Vine users are most likely to create silly six-second videos (like their parents do), but there’s also a ton of really inappropriate content, both violent and sexual, on Vine. While Vine Labs has taken steps to restrict access to explicit videos, they’re still out there in spades. Vine has recently been used to document animal cruelty by teens, and it’s also been linked to bullying, including video of kids who weren’t aware they were being recorded.”

#7 Ask.fm

“The Ask.fm app (and accompanying website) is intended to be a friendly Q+A forum to get to know people better. In reality, it’s rife with bullying and sexually charged discussion. To say the least. Questions can be answered anonymously, which adds to the potential for kids to make comments that they wouldn’t if they could be identified. If you happen to notice this on your kid’s phone, be aware that concerns about Ask.fm are incredibly serious: It’s been implicated as a factor in five teen suicides.”

#6 Tinder

“We really wish we didn’t have to include the online dating app Tinder in this list, but we do–because kids are using it. (We know. We’re feeling pretty gross about that too.) Teens like Tinder because it only matches you with people who like you back, and that provides some major positive reinforcement, which makes them want to keep using it. Yeah, we’ve come a long way from simply mustering up the courage to talk to the cute guy in Bio class… Tinder especially concerns us because matches are limited to a geographic area, which means kids are connecting with people in the local area who uh, may not actually be other kids.”

#5 Kik

“Messenger This app is known for its quick instant messaging and allows users to exchange videos, pictures, and sketches made through the app. Sounds fun, right? Well yes, it can be. But many teens use the app for sexting and dating purposes as well. The term “sex buddy” is being replaced with “Kik buddy.” Did that get your attention? By use of social media websites, teens have reportedly placed classified ads for sex by providing users with their Kick username. Additionally, Kik does not have any parental controls and there is no way of authenticating users, which makes it easy for underage users as well as pedophiles to use the messenger app.”

#4 ChatRoulette

“This groundbreaking site lets anyone engage in video chat via webcam with random strangers. Users under 18 are prohibited, as is nudity, but nobody's checking IDs at the door or making sure everyone is wearing pants (trust me, they aren't). And if you do get booted for violating those terms, there are lookalike services (like Omegle, ChatRandom, or DirtyRoulette) with even fewer restrictions.”

*Though this is not an app (because it requires ‘flash’ which is Apple has not made available on the iPhone, unless ‘Jailbroken’) it can be accessed on any phone with Adobe Flash.

#3 Whisper

“Whisper is a confession app for teenagers that allows users to superimpose self-written text over a picture of their choice. What makes the app interesting is that the users are anonymous and thus, so are the secrets they post. Whisper provides a sense of freedom for young users to share their feelings, emotions, and confessions to others without their identity being revealed. However, this app has commonly used for bullying… Because users are anonymous, teens have posted photographs of other teens with inappropriate text superimposed over the image. Additionally, the anonymous aspect means that users do not have to register and that there is no user profile.” *See also PostSecret.

#2 SnapChat

Yes, SnapChat is one of the most used apps at NBHighSchool and the country AND is also my number two of most concerning (it’s probably a toss up with Omegle).  So what is it?  In short it’s an app that gives you the ability to send picture texts that disappear. Pretty obvious what can happen in a conversation between teens who think whatever they say cannot be traced!  Couple quick thoughts: it was created to sext, you can take screen shots and save them to your phone’s photo library, SnapChat does have the ability to retrieve ‘snaps’ from any user after they “disappear”.  I personally have been wrestling hard with my stance on SnapChat for months knowing it’s such a quick and easy way to communicate (and fun) but recently decided to go ahead and delete it and would encourage you to do the same (Click here to read a post with some great points you might not have thought about).

#1 Omegle: Talk to Strangers! (Yes, this is their real tagline)

“Omegle has been around since 2008, with video chat added in 2009.  When you use Omegle you do not identify yourself through the service – chat participants are only identified as “You” and “Stranger”.  From there however, anything goes – certainly a chat participant may decide to give their name, location, age and other personal information…The Omegle homepage clearly states that the service is not for those under 13: “Do not use Omegle if you are under 13. If you are under 18, use it only with a parent/guardian’s permission.”  I’m guessing that not too many 16 year olds are asking mom or dad for the okay… Note: Using video chat requires that your computer’s IP address is made available to the stranger’s computer:  “Omegle video chat requires a direct connection to be made between your computer and the other user’s computer…”  At the end of an Omegle chat, users have the option to save the chat’s log and share the link.”

*Personal note: I know of more than one student in counseling and with law enforcement involved for some of the things that went on during their time on Omegle.

References:

- Five Mobile Apps That Should Scare the Pants Off Parents 

- 4 Cell Phone Apps Parents Should Be Aware Of

- iPhone Apps Kids Use That Parents Should Know About

- 4 apps kids are using that parents really should know about

- 4 Apps Teens Love that Parents Need to Monitor

**If you are interested in my personal three-hour training of the '10 Things YOU Should Know About Teens & Tweens' please e-mail me for a FREE copy of the manuel and video link!!

**Follow Jeff, also known as "surgeberg" on: Facebook, Twitter & Instagram